I Hope God Speaks to You in a Nice and Polite Manner.

Do you ever feel like God is trying to say "Hey, stop being an asshat and listen to me" ?

This seems to be a common theme in my prayer life recently. I'm not saying the Holy Spirit uses those words exactly, but overall that's the picture I've been getting from God. 

"Let's work this out- but first, you have to remember that I am the one in control. Stop being an idiot. Stop running to empty things. Trust me for once, would ya? " like I said in the title- I hope God speaks to you in a polite manner. My skull is too thick for that to work on me. 

Who knows. Maybe that's just me. Through the last few months, I've been seeing that more often than not, my sin (intentional and not) is rooted in a lack of trusting God. I either don't trust Him to give me what I want/think I need, or I don't trust that He has somethin better for me.Instead of allowing Him to be Lord in my life, I refuse the possibility that true fulfillment is found in Him, and run to empty, destructive things. If I believed that the Word was enough to get me through a moment of temptation, maybe I would open it instead of a laptop. If I trusted that God would satisfy me emotionally, I would not turn to guys for affirmation. If I trusted that God would meet my needs financially, I wouldn't strive as much. If I trusted that God would provide me with peace, I wouldn't fight so hard for my own security. Etc, etc, etc. My sin, my operating under the desires of my flesh, it comes from a lack of trusting that God is who He says He is, and will do what He promises. If I believe and trust that He HAS freed me from the dominion of sin, then I am empowered to walk a life that is not enslaved to moments of weakness and self-inflicted shame. If I believed that He will meet my needs financially, then I can live a life without fear of debt, and being trapped by a time-clock. If I believe and trust that God will supply anointing and opportunities for ministry, by His Spirit, and in His timing, I don't have to be a slave of business in ministry. 

If I trusted God, I could live freely and walk in light like He intends for me too. 

The problem, is I can hardly get out of my own way long enough to listen, long enough to hear, long enough to believe, and long enough to walk in a trusting relationship with the only one who has proven Himself trustworthy. 

Wow. Welp, you're welcome for the word vomit.